I love you.
Someone told Alice a couple of weeks ago. Alice only smiled not because she didn’t know what to say but she knew it wasn’t the right time to say it.
She will not deny though, that it made her heart skip a beat and it made her stomach perform somersaults. It felt like bonfire on a cold winter night and at the same time like a taste of whiskey after a long day. It burned in all the edges of her being, setting her on fire—alive and breathing.
It meant a lot to her to be told Someone loved her. Of course, Alice knew about the love Someone felt for her—but it still felt different hearing it loud and clear. It defied doubts and it answered questions.
But Alice only smiled because perhaps, there’s no better answer to I Love You other than to love the person back.
She met The Douchebag when she was 15. She must admit, she imagined a future with him—a white picket fence, children, birthday parties, and gray hair. He was nice and sweet, and he was frankly everything 15-year-old Alice wanted. But The Douchebag became the douche that he is and shattered everything Alice believed in.
She was 15 when, she thinks, she first felt love… or something similar to that. Apparently, he was also sweet and nice and dreamy to Alice’s best friend. It doesn’t bother Alice anymore five years later but Alice was thankful of The Douchebag for teaching her something about herself: she’s selfish—she hates sharing.
Then, she remembers meeting The One That Got Away—who, apparently, got away.
He was sweet and he smelled nice. He always smiles when he sees Alice, like she was an answer to a long-forgotten mathematical equation. They danced when the music is good, they talked about the weather, they talked about sports, he let Alice play his saved PSP games, and downloaded the ones Alice wanted to play.
The day he finally asked her out, she only smiled sadly and said no.
Alice wasn’t ready then, not because of The Douchebag but because she knew she didn’t deserve someone like him. He was too good to be true and Alice was a mess; she needed to fix herself to be able to unselfishly give her heart. And by the time Alice was ready, he found someone else who was ready for him—someone who deserved him more.
The One That Got Away made Alice realize: timing is everything.
Then, there was The Soulmate.
The Soulmate was the person that, at one point, made Alice really happy. The Soulmate made Alice look forward to the day, smile on a bad night, carry on through everything. The Soulmate knew every inch of her—loved every inch of her.
Alice almost believed that The Soulmate was The One—and for a time, she wanted The Soulmate to be the one.
But just like everyone else in Alice’s life, The Soulmate left and maybe, Alice just wanted too much of everything. She knew it took a lot to love her and she doesn’t blame The Soulmate for leaving. Perhaps soul mates don’t always end up together; even our soul wouldn’t stay in our body forever. Through The Soulmate, Alice learned two things: one, how it was to really love and two, how it was to really cry.
For the first time in her life, Alice found her heart broken.
And then, The Stranger came and fixed everything that was wrong about Alice’s heart. The Stranger made Alice smile again, feel again. The Stranger brought Alice back to life by simply passing by her office desk and smiling at her. The Stranger made Alice wish upon a star but also made her realize that not all wishes come true.
But it was okay.
Alice will never forget The Stranger’s blue oversized shirt, The Stranger’s smile, and the way The Stranger laughs—those things still make Alice smile sometimes but The Stranger is nonetheless a stranger and that’s how it will always be.
Maybe, time will heal our hearts.
Different people had come and gone. These people taught Alice everything she knew about love.
On that night Someone told her the three words she’d been wanting to hear, everything she knew about love didn’t seem to matter anymore. Someone defies everything she thought she knew, Someone gives her new ideas, Someone makes her feel things she never felt before—all the while restoring the Alice everyone thought was dead.
Someone made Alice believe again: in love, in life, in magic.
Someone is everything Alice never thought she wanted. Someone brings Alice to new heights and Someone completes everything that was missing in her life.
Perhaps, Someone really destroyed Alice’s axis while building a new one. Perhaps, Alice doesn’t know what title to give Someone because she can’t stomach thinking of a conclusion. She doesn’t want a conclusion just yet. Just having Someone is enough right now.
So, one morning, Alice handed Someone a note that read: “Do what the rest of them failed to do. Stay.”
And at that moment, it was more of a wish than a message.
After the Storm – Mumford and Sons
Love’s to Blame – Joel and Luke